Q&A with Dr. Miriam Kirmayer: Why Workplace Connection Matters More Than Ever
Workplace culture has changed dramatically in recent years, and with it, the way we connect. While technology has made communication easier, it hasn’t necessarily made it more meaningful. Many employees still feel isolated, and companies struggle to foster real relationships within their teams. But research shows that strong social ties improve mental health, boost creativity, and drive organizational success.
Dr. Miriam Kirmayer, a clinical psychologist and leading expert on friendship and connection, has spent over a decade studying how relationships impact well-being and work. In this Q&A, she shares why connection matters now more than ever, the common mistakes organizations make, and what leaders can do to build workplaces where people don’t just work together, they thrive together.
Q: How does today’s tense environment make social connection more important than ever?
Dr. Miriam Kirmayer: The research is clear: social connection isn’t just a ‘nice-to-have’, it’s one of the strongest predictors of mental health, longevity, and both personal and organizational success. When we feel connected to our colleagues and communities, we’re more creative, collaborative, generative, and resilient.
And yet, the moments we need connection the most, times of uncertainty, stress, opportunity, or change, are also when it feels hardest to cultivate. Right now, 1 in 5 people feel lonely at work, and 43% don’t believe their organization is doing enough to foster connection.
It’s easy to blame hybrid and remote work, but the real challenge isn’t physical separation, it’s emotional distance. Loneliness at work isn’t just an individual struggle; it’s a business imperative. When connection suffers, so do engagement, retention, and performance. That’s why my work focuses on helping people, teams, and organizations bridge the connection divide, the gap between their real and ideal relationships.
The good news? Social connection isn’t just a skill, it’s a strategy. And it’s not just a challenge, it’s an untapped opportunity. When we invest in connection with intention, we don’t just build stronger, more supportive communities and cultures—we create environments where people thrive and organizations flourish.
Q: What’s a common mistake organizations make when it comes to strengthening workplace relationships?
Dr. Miriam Kirmayer: Here are three of the most common mistakes I see:
Forcing opportunities for connection instead of listening to employees’ needs.
Meetings, social events, offsites, and gatherings are far more effective when people feel heard and valued. It’s not just about inclusivity, it’s about creating the conditions for genuine conversations and collaborations to unfold. When people feel ownership over how they connect, they’re far more likely to engage in meaningful ways.
Overlooking the essential role of leadership.
Connection isn’t just an individual responsibility, it needs to be actively supported and modeled by leaders. Leadership buy-in makes a huge difference, yet disconnection is alarmingly high at the top. Supporting leaders in fostering connection benefits everyone, but it starts with helping them recognize how to support others while also ensuring their own connection needs are met. A connected leader creates a connected culture.
Treating connection as a one-and-done effort.
A single conversation, memo, or event isn’t enough. Just like relationships, a culture of connection requires ongoing effort. Organizations that intentionally weave connection into daily rhythms—through regular meetings, shared rituals, and meaningful initiatives related to belonging, mentorship, and social health—see stronger engagement, retention, and success.
Meaningful connection isn’t built in a day, but it’s built every day. It’s a privilege to share the small, everyday strategies and mindset shifts that create a massive impact at every level.
Q: Okay, but what does friendship really have to do with work? And what even is a friendship expert?
Dr. Miriam Kirmayer: I’ve spent over a decade researching friendship and social connection, developed a measure of social competence, and interviewed hundreds of people to understand what really makes our relationships thrive. I’m a licensed clinical psychologist and these days, I primarily work as a speaker and consultant, helping people and organizations build the kinds of relationships that transform both well-being and work.
I like to say I’m a professional speaker… and also a professional listener!
We can learn a lot about how to be better leaders, managers, colleagues, and community members by applying the science and psychology of friendship. And organizations are catching on, fast. It turns out that not just feeling connected, but having a close friend (or a best friend) at work is a unique and powerful driver of engagement, satisfaction, and resilience.
Finally, there’s an undeniable tie-in with the topic of support. It’s one of the core functions of friendship, and I’m passionate about helping people discover meaningful, sustainable ways to lift others up and encourage growth, without burning out in the process.
What I love most about this work is striking the balance between the universal (we all need connection) and the personal (what that looks like varies for each of us). It’s been incredibly rewarding to see this conversation evolve and to explore how social connection applies across industries—from healthcare and education to sales, marketing, leadership, hospitality, and beyond.
Want to learn more?
Visit Miriam Kirmayer’s page to explore her work, speaking topics, and latest insights on building connection at work and beyond.
